Being a Proud and Humble Parent
Humility is hard for a proud Mommy. It is in my nature to want to showcase my children, to show the world how incredibly amazing they are. Of course, I consider my kids to be my greatest accomplishment, so why not proclaim their awesomeness to anyone who will listen? Their cuteness and brilliance makes a great topic of conversation and a wonderful post on Facebook. When they make straight A's or impress a substitute teacher at school…when they play so well together or treat someone kindly…when they memorize Scripture or hit a homerun…I’m just a proud Mommy, right? A proud Mommy, yes, but a humble one?
The Lord has been challenging my humility in how I view my children. This might seem really twisted because, after all, aren’t we supposed to be super proud of our children? Doesn’t God want us to celebrate their successes in who they are becoming? Just because we think much of our children doesn’t mean we aren’t humble…right?
I have been prideful about my children. Pride is opposite of humility.
Colossians 3:12 says: “And so, as those who have been chosen of God, holy and beloved, put on a heart of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.”
Compassion…Kindness…Humility…Gentleness…Patience…For those who’s kid doesn’t know how to read as well as my 5 year old. For those who want to share about their kid’s successes with me without me comparing mine at the same time (in my head). For those of whom I am jealous because their kid is better at baseball than my kid.
“For through the grace given to me I say to every man among you not to think more highly of himself than he ought to think; but to think so as to have sound judgment, as God has allotted to each a measure of faith.” Romans 12:3
This is easy for me, kind of. Most of the time I don’t think of myself more highly than I ought to (our view of ourselves is a whole other blog). But, if this verse said, “For through the grace given to me I say to every mommy not to think more highly of her children than she ought to think…”, now that is not as easy for me.
You might be thinking, “But wait a minute, in the Bible, doesn’t Jesus say we should become like little children’? Doesn’t Jesus himself think very highly of His precious children?”
Yes, He adores His children. But not because they made the select choir group or because they won first place in the pageant. He loves them because He made them. He loves the child who is a struggling reader. He adores the child that is flunking math. Jesus loves that kid who can’t even throw the ball right. And He even loves the child who’s own Mommy can’t even think of anything good about him/her.
And my child is no better than them. My child deserves no better recognition or no higher praise. Who deserves the praise when Ainsley’s teacher tells me that she is kind to everyone in her class? Who deserves the praise when Braxton is the first one in his class to make it to the Wall of Fame for his good behavior?...Jesus. I honor Him for anything good that comes out of my children. I praise Him for the fruit I see in their lives.
Putting my children on a pedestal is pride. And Satan uses it to distract us from who really deserves to be on the throne of our heart…Jesus.
If we are not careful, their outward successes determine their value.
“My kid didn’t make it into gifted so she isn’t as smart as those kids.” Or, “My son didn’t make the All Star team, but I want him to be the best baseball player in the world.” Sometimes our kids aren’t Facebook-post-worthy, but their value is no less than when we could post good things about them all day long and still not say it all.
Let’s stop playing the comparing game, or the “my kid is better than yours” game. Let’s just humbly walk this life as fellow Mommies who are thankful for our own children and each other’s children. Let’s be comfortable in who our children are, enough to know we don’t have to dwell on it or prove it to the world. There is something humbling about knowing how great my children are, but keeping that between me and the One who made it possible.
“Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind let each of you regard one another as more important than himself; do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others. Have this attitude in yourselves which was also in Christ Jesus, who, although He existed in the form of God, did not regard equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied Himself, taking the form of a bond-servant, and being made in the likeness of men. And being found in appearance as a man, He humbled Himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross. Therefore also God highly exalted Him, and bestowed on Him the name which is above every name, that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, of those who are in heaven, and on earth, and under the earth, and that every tongue should confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.” Phil. 2:3-11
Brooke Williams writes, serves, and makes disciples in Florida with her husband, Brian, and her church, Heritage Community Church, as she spiritually invests in their two children, Ainsley & Braxton.
